Returning to Work

Before drawing the contempt of my non-workplace working moms, I think this meme should be changed to say “all moms” because it really doesn’t matter if you leave for a workplace in the morning or stay home, you is tired!

I didn’t think I’d be writing a post on this topic for another 4 months, but here I am. I definitely did NOT want to leave the babies this early.  But, due to my own lack of knowledge and understanding that maternity benefits are incredibly ridiculous in public education (and this country), and an exceptionally long, unforeseen 2 months in the hospital waiting for these boys to arrive eating up my FMLA time – I am returning to the classroom next week.
I will probably save my ire for the lack of benefits for teachers in this country for another (much longer) post. But seriously, if you wanna run for president or even governor why don’t you try the TEACHER platform?  You can throw in the fights of public education inadequacies in there too. Simply raise teachers salaries and give them benefits that are worth a darn, I’ll vote for you, and I have a feeling 300k+ in the state of Texas or 3.1MM in the US would vote for you too! Oh and I bet with an increased value on the educator profession you’ll even see better results in the classroom as you’ll obtain and retain GOOD QUALIFIED teachers instead of the whack job creeps who are on the news running away with 15 year olds. Ok, tangent fully taken.  I guess I didn’t save my opinions for another post.

No offense cable TV installers. Get it together ‘Merica!

Back to the topic at hand.

Anxiety.  Yep. I’ve got it. I am not ready to leave the boys.  I even posed a rhetorical question to my husband yesterday and said “the boys won’t forget me in 18 days, will they?” Of course, I know they won’t.  Who do you think is going to be feeding them in the middle of the night? How can they forget me!  Ha! But, I think this has to be a real struggle for working moms who are going back to work for the first time.  How do you leave them?  I’ve had people tell me that I would be ready to go back to work, to get a break, but I’m not!  I’m not ready to leave their insane screams for no apparent reason, the dirty diapers, and everything that is new everyday.  I want to stay and cuddle them and kiss them for as long as possible before they can be too cool for that.  Yeah, it’s 18 days, it’s not going to break me… or them, I know.  But I can still worry about it!  My anxiety and fear has nothing to do with returning to the classroom and everything to do with what I’m leaving everyday to go there.  My teacher side is happy to finish the year with that classroom full of kiddos that walked in last August & to see them on to 5th grade (and to see the amazing progress and transformations I know they’ve all gone through since I’ve been gone), but my mom side is sad that every day I have to leave these little tiny humans I created! I’m sure it’ll get easier after the first couple of days, and the one benefit teachers get that I can’t complain about, I’ll get the entire summer to pick right back up with these munchkins!

Also, I’m going to preemptively apologize to my family and co-workers for the probable breakdown(s) I will have next week, our nanny for the constant texts requesting updates she’ll receive for those 18 days, and the dumb— politicians who created a system where moms get so little time home caring for new babies for the MANY not so nice words I will speak about you – actually I don’t apologize for the last one, at all!!


Sleep Training 

Sleep and newborns are not typically two things that are said in the same sentence. I went from a self-proclaimed lover of sleep to… well I’m still a lover of sleep who just gets less of it! We’ve been relatively lucky from the get-go.  Both boys have always been on the minimum of 3 hour feeding schedule which was what the hospital started.  The 1-2hour bursts of sleep definitely aren’t ideal, but in perspective Chris has a work associate who had twins a week after us… and both babies are colic.  He says they get 15 minute naps at most!  So, I’m happy with what we got!

We did start sleep training our boys.  I didn’t know sleep training was controversial, and to be honest, if you think it’s terrible then let’s agree to disagree!  Sleep training to me, is getting the babies to sleep through the night. Some parents don’t ever have to TRY to get their babies to sleep through the night.. You’re welcome, Mom!… but some babies (preemies very much included) have to break the 3 hour feeding machine.  We’ve got to Understand the habits we’ve created by feeding every 3 hours.  It’s like my nightly bath habit, do I need it? Absolutely not. But, I’ve been doing it as long as I can remember and my body is so used to it that falling asleep without it feels wrong and I WANT it!  We’ve created the habit with the boys that they need to be up and eating every 3 hours – and they don’t… usually. So, slowly but surely we are pushing their feedings out longer until we reach the goal of all night!

Now, how do we do this?  There are a ton of books and theories and programs – pick whatever you want they all seem to get to the same thing.  But ultimately, adjust it to YOU!  Here’s how I’ve chosen to do it, right or wrong, doesn’t matter – it’s working for us!  The boys eat a lot… thankfully, they are getting more than average daily ounces. (6-7 feeds x 3-4 ounces = 24-28 ounces per day).  Our boys will easily take 4.5 most feeds and the littlest chunker will eat 6-7 sometimes. You’ve got to make sure they are getting their calories in the day so they aren’t hungry at night! 

So here’s how my day looks (currently at 6 weeks):

9-10am: Breakfast – we wake up get unswaddled, clothes & diapers changed and feed.  30 minutes for food and I give a larger than normal bottle – 5 ounces instead of 4. I like to do it early so it doesn’t mess with the big dinner feed! 30 mins-1 hour of mom making stupid jokes and funny voices while the boys look at me like I’m the weirdest person on earth.  Then they will nap. I give the boys a probiotic with this bottle to kick start the digestive tract!

11ish-1pm: napping – sometimes they may only get an hour, it really depends on them that day.

1pm: Lunch – eat. Play. Nap.  This nap normally starts a little quicker than the morning. If I’m out then we sometimes eat on the Go (or before going) and nap in the car seats.  Sleep training methods sometimes say you need to be at home at all times, but ain’t nobody got time for that. My boys do just fine with naps while we’re out – it hasn’t messed up the evenings once.

2ish-3:30 napping

3:30-4 Afterschool snack. I usually have to wake both boys up for this feeding & awake time. 

…here’s where my schedule has evolved to meet our needs and demands…

4:30-5 should be going down for a nap. Both my munchkins have no issue staying awake here.  So if I see the signs of sleepy (slow blinks, yawns, etc) then they will sleep, more often they are wide eyed and bushy tailed so they stay awake, tummy time, playing with Mom or brother and sister, etc.  They may fall off about 6-6:30 and I let them catnap.

7-7:30 Dinner/Bedtime Routine.  Sleep training says to give a bath everyday.  I don’t.  I’m on the boat of it’ll dry out their skin, and they can’t get that dirty in a day!  So, every 2-3 days they get a full on bath, otherwise they get a wipe down.  I give them the MOST food they will take during this feeding.  It’s pretty consistently been 6-7 ounces for Jack, and Cullen is a little less.  Which is backwards considering Cullen is a pound bigger, but whatever, it works for them. I then let them lay there for a few minutes before changing clothes and diapers (helps with the spitting up for us)… then comes the swaddle!  

8-8:30: bedtime. Our night nurse recommended the Miracle Blanket & it’s been amazing!  At first it seems they don’t like it but give it a minute and they are relaxed.  I then put them down in bed (awake), turn on the sound machine loud (we no longer use white noise as my conspiracy theorist husband thinks it’s Satanic – so we use the fan setting), and then I’m out of their room.  This is where sleep training really starts.  You have to let them fall asleep on their own, not rocking or in a chair… on their own, in their crib. Ours have been in cribs since Day 1.  Literally, in the hospital they were in room obviously, but when they came home they went to sleep in their own room.  No bassinet. No bedside.  In their room.  We haven’t had an issue with falling asleep/crying all night.  So I don’t really practice cry-it-out because they don’t cry when I put them down.  Jack will take longer to go to sleep but he’s usually quiet and just lays there, Cullen pretty much passes out immediately.  They do have to be burped well and had time to let the formula sit or else they do fuss because their bellies aren’t comfortable.

>>Sleep training<<

At this point BEFORE we started sleep training the boys would wake up 3-4 hours later.  We would feed. Then repeat.  It made for 2-3 feedings per night.  So my sleep training goes like this…

Hear fussing/crying. Set timer on phone for 3-5 minutes (depends on your comfort level, I went with 3 a couple times then moved to 5, now I’m at 5-7) I let the timer go up.  If they have stopped crying – GREAT! If they are still fussy, then I go in check the swaddle, give the pacifier and leave! This may get an extra 1 minute or it may get an extra hour, whatever it is, they’ve let their body know they CAN wait! I will repeat this until they get the pacifier 3 times.  On the third time, that’s my sign it’s time for a bottle. 

Imagine your older kids asking for something over and over.  If you make them wait sometimes it never comes up again, if they continue asking then it’s probably legitimate.  At least that’s how my older kids are, they ask for a toy once, and I say no, then I never hear about it again.  They ask, I say no, time goes by, they ask again, I say no, finally enough time passes and I think hey they might really want this toy and play with it for more than 15 seconds. It’s my analogy just go with it.

In less than 2 weeks…really one week of full on training, the boys now wake up after 6 hours and then again at 4 hours.  I’m happy with the progress.  You can easily tell if a baby is hungry or eating out of habit if you get up to feed and they don’t take a full bottle.  That was our first sign!  They’ve started to decrease their intake for the 6 hour feed, so I imagine it won’t be long until it’s eliminated and we’re sleeping 10 hours! 

>>Now back to our current schedule<<

1-2am late night feed. Stay swaddled unless they are dirty, then their arms stay swaddled and I change them & swaddle back up.  Ours woke up too much when I unswaddled them, so I stopped. When finished they go right back to their cribs to sleep. I don’t talk to them I keep the lights off, I really limit stimulation.  I do sneak kisses when burping them and then when I put them down.  I’m not an animal!  😘 **this is the one I think we’re close to getting rid of as their consumption is decreasing and it’s pushing out longer.**

5:30-6: early morning feed. Another one that will eventually be eliminated when they are eating more/bigger. We follow the same routine as the late night feed & they go back down right after. They sleep until it’s wake up time!

As a creature of habit, i completely understand they are creatures of habit too! Having some idea of what we’re doing helps, and we’re not just running to them at every noise, wasting food when they aren’t hungry, and completely exhausted! Now, I am also not a slave to our schedule.  I try my hardest to keep it close for now while we’re establishing the routines, but I do not avoid life for it.  I can’t avoid life because of it, we have two other kids (big kids) who require things, have sports and their schedules too.  I also have to get out of the house!  So, we make it work the best we can.  If it doesn’t work, I’m not a mess about it.  We move on.  I know I’m not creating new habits in one missed schedule time!  And I don’t beat myself up over it either…. at all.  They have had bottles on the go, naps in shopping carts, and skipped feeding times during the day while we were traveling.  Guess what? They are still alive AND we got right back to our schedule the next day!  I promise, it’s ok to live AND have babies!

Oh and for the twin moms because I questioned this one a lot… one baby crying does not necessarily wake up the other.  I have our sound machine situated between the two cribs and I imagine it drowns out some of the noise for the other, but it really removes the “startle” factor of one starting to cry. Honestly, I think these two stinkers sleep better when the other is making noise.  I’ve had one in full on melt down and gone in and the other is fast asleep!  So, while thinking that one crying must be stopped immediately to avoid waking the other may seem reasonable, more than likely it’s not even a problem!


Warp Speed

Another 2 and half weeks have come and gone.  Seriously, time seemed to go at a glacial speed in the months leading up to the best day… and since then… warp speed! 

I cannot even begin to explain how much I love these two wonderful little gifts God sent to us.

Life of Six

We are all finally adjusting to our new life as a family of six.  Of course; I’m learning as soon as I get comfortable with the current routine and stages with the boys they are on to the next! I’ve been quite humbled in my time as Mom!  I used to think I knew it ALL, these two 6 week old boys have taught me, I know NOTHING! I’m so thankful for our on call medical guru Auntie Lauren whom I seriously text weekly with “is this normal?” Or “should I be worried about…” Raising a tiny human…errr tiny humanS is like speaking Mandarin Chinese to me.  I have no idea what’s going on! I am also amazed at all the amazing mothers we are surrounded by who have rocked this parenting thing.  It wasn’t until I became a parent that I fully understood just how hard it really is!!  People have told me I’m doing a good job or they are impressed at what we’re doing, but I can honestly tell you I fail. every. single. day. However, Having the boys has given me the gift of a little more patience, which I so desperately needed. At the end of my pregnancy I had none… for most of my life I had very little.  Something about having these two babies has given me a brand new appreciation for just about everything and everyone that surrounds me.

One Month Older

One month checkups went great.  The boys astounded their pediatrician with their growth.  It has been off the charts fast!  Each are gaining a pound a week and over and inch! My arms better bulk up quick to keep carrying them around! Cullen is noticeably bigger than Jack, but it’s still only a pound difference in both and Jack has caught up in height. They are my big chunky monkey and little chunky monkey.  I’m pretty sure as twins they need to be prepared for a lifetime of comparisons.

Night Nurse/Life Saver

At the urging/suggestion of my in-laws we hired a night nurse for a couple nights a week.  Life. Saver. I was so excited and anxious for her first night.  Excited for sleeping longer than 4 hours and anxious about not being the one to be there in the middle of the night.  We are in week 2 and I can tell you all anxiety has passed and I look forward to the nights where my body will get to rejuvenate. Our night nurse is amazing as well.  We officially started the sleep training this week since the boys are big enough to wait for feedings.  The goal is sleeping through the night, obviously for preemies who are 1 week adjusted age this has taken a little longer.  Weight gain and getting up to newborn size was first and foremost.  Hopefully these little nuggets will be sleeping through the night soon!!

Highlights of the past two weeks

  1. Memaw and Grandpa moved in to their new house – 200 yards away! 
  2. Road trip as a family of 6 to the Alpine ranch – unfortunate reasons, but got to spend time with family we wouldn’t have normally seen for quite some time!
  3. One month check up went amazing!
  4. Cullen dealing with reflux – trying to find the right balance of formula and medication. Jack considerably less symptoms of reflux.
  5. Bought a mom car.
  6. Celebrated our first Easter 🐣 

I’m so excited for whatever comes next for us! We have a family vacation for Mothers Day that I’m so excited for, our second year wedding anniversary, and the end of the school year for the big kids. May will be full of exciting things for this family of six!


The First Weeks of Twinlife

The first week with the twins born we sadly only got to have little Jack home with us.  After two days in room with us, both boys had to do a car seat test.  Jack passed, however Cullen did not.  He was dropping his oxygen levels below the threshold.  He had been on the line of what caused concern for his breathing and after some observation in the nursery, the pediatrician decided to move him to the NICU so that they could observe more closely and redo the car seat test.  This was very hard to have one baby with us and the other downstairs.  Luckily, at first we were all in the hospital, so everyone got lots of love.  Cullen ended up failing the car seat test 3 times before he passed.  He spent an extra 4 days in the NICU after we went home.  He was completely healthy by all accounts, except when they put him in that car seat.  It was hard driving back and forth leaving one baby at a time.  There were some tears shed the last couple of days of making the journey to the hospital.  I just wanted BOTH of my babies home with me.  We talked about so many options to just get that boy home!  Chris even contemplated a helicopter ride!!  Haha all ideas were completely unrealistic, but desperation can create some crazy thoughts!! I can say now, and I knew it then, we were lucky.  Cullen wasn’t having issues with his health and I was never once concerned about his well-being.  I know that others are in the NICU and it’s not the same story… and it’s much longer.  Jack adjusted to his new routine at home and even with Cullen in the NICU they were on the same feeding schedule, which made for a nice transition once we got him home!

Both munchkins together for the first time at home!

The second week we got to bring Cullen home when they were 8 days old.  Dad and I watched the entire 90 minute car seat test and thank God he made it through – Chris even got Starbucks for our two nurses in hopes of good karma!!  We thankfully took him home that same night.  The past two weeks have been pretty smooth.  I mean, of course, like any new parents our sleep schedule is adjusting.  But our boys usually only wake up 2 times through the night (after our 11pm feed until 7 or 8am).  I shouldnt complain, even though I sometimes do.  I think both of them have had some issues with reflux which only seems to bother them a little.  We elevated their crib mattresses and try to adjust how we feed, but for preemies I think we got really lucky.   We have had to start putting Cullen in the MamaRoo for 20 mins after feeds to help the reflux while he sleeps.

Cullen during his FINAL car seat test!!!

I’m so thankful to my mom and mother-in-law who alternated weeks staying with us for the first few weeks.  I got to get some naps in while they watched the boys.  We also have some of the BEST friends in the world who have helped us more than you can imagine.  The boys are lucky to have such awesome aunties and amazing grandmas!

We have managed to transition to a family of six fairly smoothly and I’m so thankful for that!!  Both of our older kids are amazing helpers and adore their little brothers so much!  It makes my heart so happy to see them all interacting together.  I can’t wait for the future!  We got the okay from the pediatrician to start having outings with the babies so we’ve started to venture out some which I think helps us all!

C-Section Recovery

I can’t believe the recovery from my c-section.  I had warned Chris that I would be down and out for weeks after the surgery based on what I had read.  I’ve been so lucky to make a great recovery!  I was walking the same day as the c-section (just to the bathroom) and stopped taking the pain medication about a week and half later.  I can tell when I overdo things later in the day, but before we left the hospital I was walking around on my own, lifting babies, going from post partum to the NICU – with very minimal pain.  Praise the big man upstairs for that one!  My doctors also did a fantastic job on the incision!  I took my bandage off on Day 6 and it looked as if it had been healing for weeks!  I couldn’t believe it!  My body still has some recovering to do, but I think I got WAY lucky all around with this pregnancy and delivery!

Things I’ve Learned About Preemies

  1. The Preemie Grunt – wow!  I didn’t even know this was a thing, until we were living it.  After a google search I learned it was in fact common!  Both boys will grunt for hours – we thought it was gas at first but I think it’s just their preemie way.  It’ll keep you up, until you learn they aren’t in pain and are still developing! Now I’ve come to think of it as my own sleep sound machine – it’s also reassuring that they are alive and breathing!  I find when it’s too quiet I start to panic!  😜
  2. Preemie clothes are impossible to find! Seriously, we have about 12 preemie sized outfits and I think I’ve bought every outfit I’ve found.  You think there would be more selection!  Poor babies get swallowed in the NB clothes!!  Someone needs to get on this lack of merchandise!!
  3. Everyone will comment on how little they are – I’ve gotten used to how little they are, and when I see newborn (full term) babies I think they are huge!  Take tons of pictures because they won’t stay that tiny!  Both of ours are still smaller than most full term babies, but I feel like they have doubled in size!!
  4. Things take longer. I have to constantly remind myself (and my husband) that we have two babies who would still be considered “early” if born today.  I can’t rely on the internet or books for milestones, because at 3 weeks old, they would still only be 38 weeks gestation.  Their little bodies are still developing.  We can’t compare apples to oranges! 

❤️ Moments that melt this sleepy mommas heart!! ❤️



Playing Catch Up – The Birth

Wow!  Time is flying!  It was 3 weeks ago (tomorrow) that we were introduced to the handsome Cullen & Jack.  I seriously can’t really wrap my head around how quick the time has gone – seems the opposite of when I was waiting in the hospital to meet them!  So let’s back track a little…

Delivery Day

The day started at my usual time for hospital life, around 5 am.  I had to take an antiseptic shower and have my bed linens changed again.  They did this the night before too!  Then the nurses in Antepartum got my IV’s started (yes I had one in each arm which I was told because of two babies).  I didn’t have to monitor which was nice!  Finally, about 7-7:30am it was time to head to Labor & Delivery! It was only my second time on that floor in 7 weeks, but I was so happy to be there.  The rooms were WAY nicer in L&D than Antepartum!  Fluids were hooked up, processes were explained, and then we waited.  Getting to know my Doctor over the last 2 months made it no surprise when the nurses joked we were waiting on him… to probably get his morning Starbucks!  Closer to 9am (operation time) they took me to the OR and got me ready for surgery.  I was terrified of the spinal block shot as everything I had read was not pleasant.  I was bent over on the operating table and given the local numbing shot, it felt like a bee sting.  Then, a minute or so later came the big guy.  It was filled with pressure, but nothing out of this world painful.  They immediately laid me down and tilted the table so my head was down to let the medicine work its way down.  Now, that was a WEIRD feeling.  It felt like my whole body was asleep but I was certain I could feel everything and I started to worry that they would start cutting me open and I would feel it all.  Luckily, they did a test with a sharp point to see how much I could feel, and it went all the way to my collarbone.  She said I was short and the dosage was based on height so I think I was more numb than they planned.  Catheter.  I’ll skip the details.  And surgery time. 

I had two surgeons.  My usual doctor and another man I had never seen before.  There were about 20 people in total in the operating room.  Chris got to come in at this point as well, he immediately sat by my head and hid behind the curtain to avoid seeing anything traumatic!  They ran through the surgery plan, the nurse teams, the neonatologists waiting to assess the boys, and the surgeons.  Then we were off.  I can say, I didn’t feel a thing at first, definitely no cutting.  I could feel my body moving but nothing else.  At 9:33am we welcomed Cullen Mac.  I could hear the water being broken and an immediate loud cry.  He sounded like a baby duck and instantly tears were flowing down my face. In about 30 seconds the same thing happened for the second time and we got to say hello to Jack Hudson.  The boys were immediately taken to where the NICU teams were waiting to assess.  Both boys were doing great.  Jack got a quick admission to bedside, and we waited about 5 minutes before Cullen got bedside admission.  Thank God for healthy babies!  By all accounts, two babies born 5 weeks early going bedside was God working!  As the babies were being assessed, I was being closed up.  Chris got to go see the boys and I was stuck behind the sheet.  I was dying to know what they looked like and meet them.  It was the longest 10-15 minutes of my life.  I also was getting nauseous from the movement inside me, Chris came to check on me and said “I just saw your insides,” talk about a comment you don’t want to hear when you feel like throwing up!  They gave me some nausea medicine through the IV that helped and then FINALLY, I got to see a baby!  Chris brought one over and he was so tiny, it was instant love.  

Funny story, immediately after babies were delivered my OB stopped operating (the other doctor finished) and grabbed his cellphone to start snapping pictures of my placenta from Jack.  Apparently, it was a medical marvel by Velamentous Cord Insertion.  He always commented on the ultrasounds of it and it being interesting, I think he was waiting to get to see it first hand.  Chris snapped a photo of it after I made him, if a doctor feels the need after 20 years of delivering babies to snap a shot, it might be worth the memory.  I wont share it because it is graphic, but it’s cool.

Once I was closed up, they switched me back to my trusty old bed (that made it through 8 weeks with me) and handed me the boys!  It was awkward holding them lying flat, and still groggy, because I couldn’t see them really, but I was so happy they were there in my arms!  I was rolled back to my room where our parents and the two big kids were waiting.  Everyone was so happy and tears were flowing!

It was an easy, happy, wonderful delivery & I was so thankful to have my two boys with me finally.  It was a hard 7 weeks in that hospital, but God answered all prayers and gave us two miracle babies!

Cullen Mac – 5 lbs 7 oz – 17.5 inches born @ 9:33am

Jack Hudson – 4 lbs 7 oz – 17 inches born @ 9:34am

Proud Mom & Dad!!!


Week 7: Delivery Week!


49 days in the hospital.  I spent the entire month of February living at my hospital address. Crazy!  It takes on a whole new meaning that shock of a new month “Oh it’s already March?” when you sit in the same room for the entirety of the previous month!  This past week was an “exciting” one for me – which exciting means anything happened. It was definitely not exciting when it was happening – but luckily they were just false alarms!  I think my body got the memo that it’s getting close to delivery and tried to start practicing!

The week started with my first round of what felt like real contractions.  Of course, I typically contract daily it’s just tightening of the uterus and it doesn’t bother me, but on Monday night they were regular and painful.  I ASKED to be put on the monitors after my last session – a sign for the nurses I was being for real as much as I dislike monitoring! I ended up monitoring for almost 7 hours, got an IV with fluid, and three rounds of Demerol to try and see if the contractions would subside.  They weren’t going away, but my cervix wasn’t showing any signs of change after all the hours and the babies were doing fine so the doctor ended monitoring.  They kept me hooked up to the IV overnight (well it was the morning by this point) and by the time the doctor came back around the contractions had stopped.  They removed the IV and all seemed back to normal.  That was until Wednesday when it felt like a hippo was sitting on my chest and I couldn’t breathe – and my pulse was unusually slow (40s).  They ordered some tests and all was reporting back perfect.  The doctor on call thought it was either babies pushing up on my diaphragm and lungs causing the problem or tearing/stretching of cartilage between my ribs.  Either way, the next morning and I woke up to a pleasant surprise – I could breathe, and I could breathe better than I had been breathing before.  I think the babies dropped giving me some room.  I haven’t had any other issues since then, but it was the most action my little room had seen in 6 weeks.  I told the boys they needed to chill out until Wednesday and we would get them out… calmly!

We took our NICU tour yesterday.  It was something they told us the day we came in that we should schedule.  I don’t know if it was anxiety or scheduling, but we didn’t do it until yesterday. It was a lot to take in.  I don’t know if it ever would have been easier to do or if it being so close to their arrival made me more anxious. I know we are in a great situation and gestational age for very limited complications, but something about seeing these tiny little babies hooked up to machines in boxes was humbling.  I also couldn’t believe how small the babies were, and they weren’t even micro-preemies and all weighed 4lbs+, but the babies were much tinier than I could have imagined.  I really haven’t been able to conceptualize how small the boys are compared to what a full term (7lb+) baby would be until I saw the little cuties in the NICU.  We are praying for some strong, healthy breathing, eating and temperature regulating boys who have very limited time in the NICU for now, but we will know in less than 48 hours!

…and now for a survey wrapping up the experience of a lifetime – the last 34 weeks and 5 days of our lives – awaiting the arrival of our two boys!!

About the Mommy!
Name: Jaime
Age: 30
Hair Color: Brown
Eye Color: Hazel/Brown
First Child: Yes x 2

About the Daddy!
Name: Christopher
Age: 33
Hair Color: Brown
Eye Color: Hazel
First Child: 3rd and 4th

Finding Out!!
What day did you find out?: August 17th
How did you feel when you found out?: Thrilled, nervous and disbelieving
Who was with you?: Hunter was home… but he wasn’t WITH ME… lol.  Chris was home about 15 minutes later.
Who was the first person you told?: Chris
How did they react?: Thrilled, nervous and disbelieving.  Ha.

Telling the Grandparents!!!
How did your parents react?: My parents were shocked and excited but had to contain it since we were with the kids and hadn’t told them yet. LOL When my mom found out it was twins she didn’t believe me… at all.
How did his parents react?: Tina and Ray were both excited (even though we highjacked their anniversary celebration) and couldn’t believe it was TWINS just like their Pa!  This one was fun because Cadence and Hunter got to get in on the news!  Tom couldn’t believe what we were telling him & was VERY excited for two more Wynn babies.
Are they helping with baby names?: We ran through so many names.  Tom did suggest Mac to honor Chris’ grandfather which ended up being a middle name!
Have they bought anything for the baby yet?: Um, yes a LOT.
How often do they call to check on you?: We get checked on all the time!!  We definitely wouldn’t have been able to make it through the last 7 weeks without the help of our parents!

About the Pregnancy!!!
When was your first appointment?: I think it was a week after we found out (for blood tests) then on September 8th we had our first ultrasound and found it we were having TWINS!
When is your due date?: March 8th
How far along are you?: 34 weeks and 5 days
Have you had any ultrasounds?: More than I can count!
Have you heard the heartbeat?: 200+ hours worth of heartbeat hearing over the last 49 days!
What was the heartbeat?: Right now Jack 150s and Cullen 130s
Sex of the baby: 2 boys

About the birth!!
Do you know what you are taking with you?: I’ve had it for 7 weeks! 🙂
Who is going to be with you?: Chris in the OR + about 15 medical staff… then our family will be at the hospital.
Are you going to videotape it?: HECK NO.
Natural or Medicated?: Medicated.
Do you think you will need a c-section?: Well, considering it’s a scheduled csection I’m going to go with YES.
Will you cry when you hold your baby for the first time?: Probably.
Do you think Daddy will cry?: I don’t think so.
Do you know what you will say to the baby when you first hold him/her?: I’m thinking something along the lines of, “Thank God you are finally here!”

Do you have a name picked out?: Cullen Mac (Baby A) and Jack Hudson (Baby B)
Is your baby going to be named after someone?: Jack -> my grandfathers nickname and Mac -> Chris’ grandfather’s nickname

Other Random Questions!!
Have you felt the baby move?: They are ALWAYS moving – Jack likes to attack my rib cage and Cullen is practicing his karate on my hip bone
What was your first symptom?: Fatigue.
Will your baby have God-Parents?: Haven’t thought about that.
What is the baby’s room theme?: Rustic/hunting/western
What was the first thing you bought for the baby?: We bought little outfits for when we told our parents/family – if that counts?
Will you cloth diaper?: No.
BFing or Formula?: Formula.
What is your favorite pregnancy book?: The Internet. HA
What do you look forward to doing again once you are no longer pregnant?: Not sitting in the hospital. Being able to bend forward. Drinking a glass of wine.  Taking a bath.
What physical features do you hope baby will get from Daddy?: His eyes.
What physical features do you hope baby will get from you?: Well I don’t particularly hope that two boys have any of my female physical features.
Is he ready to be a Daddy?: He already is – but I think he’s ready to add (AND STOP ADDING) to our family! 🙂
Are you ready to be a Mommy?: Very.

The next time I’ll be posting we will have two new additions to our family and I cannot wait!  This has been a very LONG 7 weeks, but the light is finally here!!!!




Week 6: Hospital Observation


42 days.  I can’t believe it’s been 42 days in the hospital.  We are officially in the final countdown – 9 days until we get to meet our boys!!  It’s crazy to think just  how long I’ve been here.  Talk about an emotional rollercoaster – and now the reality of we are so very close to the arrival day! I’m so excited to see what the boys look like, if either of them have bruises from what feels like the fight club going on in my belly, and just how big they really are!  All very exciting things!

I’ve officially started to swell.  Somehow my body held off almost 34 weeks but this morning marked the day I had to take my wedding ring off.  I had actually just popped it off to check on the swelling, and once it was off, I realized it was not going back on.  Then they weighed me… 5 pounds in a week!  WHAT?  I’m hoping that just means those boys are getting chunky, and not that my late night Cheetos snacks are making their way to my hips! 🙂

Sleep is hit and miss now.  Some nights when I shut everything down after my last monitoring I can fall asleep pretty quickly.  Other nights, like last night, I stay up until 3am or later with my mind in full racing mode.  With the early monitoring that means I’m getting about 6 hours of sleep – which is FAR LESS than this sleepaholic girl needs to function.  I learned my lesson about napping in the day though.  Talk about a bad night, I napped one day and regretted it all night.  Now, even if I don’t get ALL the sleep I would have liked, I stay awake and it makes for a quicker night.  Perhaps, it’s natures way of getting me ready for two crying, hungry babies throughout the night.  Talk about a fun wake up call.  5 years ago Chris and I got our little Parker (dog) she slept right beside the bed and would whimper in the middle of the night to go potty, I being the peach I am in the middle of the night would angrily say some profanity and take her outside.  I still vividly remember Chris’ words those nights “how are you ever going to make it with a baby?” Well, we shall find out shortly! 🙂  I still am not taking the Ambien, at this point I figure the less medicated sleep I can get the more equipped I’ll be for “life on the outside” haha! Getting comfortable is another challenge.  I can’t lay on either of my sides because both babies have taken up residency there, so whichever side I pick leads to an attack of kicks, punches and wiggles.  Inevitably, I end up on my back at about a 45 degree angle.  I guess I can say I’m thankful for hospital beds adjusting.  Although the actuator (I think that’s the name of the part) of my bed may be close to its end or in desperate need of some WD40 from all my movement back and forth.

New mom anxiety is another subject that I’m battling. Hospital life anxiety I think was a distraction of just what was really happening.  In 9 short days I’m going to be a Mom. Of course, for the last four years I’ve been a parent, but these were elementary aged kids.  Now, it’s going to be babies.  There are so many rules for babies.  I’ve gathered that from watching friends and family have babies, it seems there’s a rule for everything.  I really believe I may have been made to have babies in the 80’s, you know if I wasn’t just born and all that.  My mom tells me all the time, we didn’t know any of that then… or we never heard that.  This overwhelming amount of information available and solicited by EVERYONE is a lot.  I’m happy to know for at least a period of time my responsibility will be to ensure the babies are eating, playing, sleeping, and then repeating. I think during that time I can get a grasp on everything! I’m comforted in knowing that I’m not the only one who around this time starts having these feelings – according to the multiple blogs and books I’ve read it’s normal. I can’t believe it’s finally so close!twins-comic

We are 2 days away from a giant milestone of 34 weeks and there are no signs that the boys are trying to sneak out early.  They are active (VERY ACTIVE), big babies that seem very happy camping out in my ribs for the time being.  Good thing is they get to stay for another 9 days.  I say good thing, but they may be ready for some room to stretch out by now too!